Holding on for dear life

5 Mar

There’s a little secret about me. I love watching Hoarders. It’s like that TV show that you don’t want to be caught watching because, why would you watch it?

Growing up, my grandmother kept everything. The house wasn’t to bad but when you went in the basement, it was a whole different story. Years and years of build up and stuff.

My Aunt who I call the “anti-hoarder” came in about three years ago and completely got rid of everything and anything. Either gave it away or threw it away. I got a few mementos from my childhood but the basement never looked the same.

The thing that really gets me though about this show is the excess. The fact that I’ve had to give up my things, little that they are, and they get to buy in excess.

Over the past five years I’ve accumulated a lot of stuff and then the past two years, most of it is gone. Divorce and moving do that. I was homeless a few times and living with a friend. My stuff was in storage and I lost it.

It gave me a new appreciation for the things that I do have in my home. My son, my friends, my keepsakes. Not to many, but somethings that I will have for the next 60 years. The things that are always listed in the “Do not drop” box when I move.

What do you hold dear? A teddy bear from your childhood or maybe the first time your child wrote their name?

Not a baseball bat. SHOTGUN!

4 Mar

Five questions… only five?

This is simple, I think.

*sighs and shuffles the bunny slippers*

Okay.

Here’s Five Question Friday from Five Crooked Halos.

1. Have you ever forgotten your child in a store or at school?
Forgotten? Nope. Misplaced? Perhaps. Intentionally left behind? Sometimes. There’s a point in every parent’s life where you need to run away from the child to make them follow. Sorta like the ducklings following the mother duck. But worse.
Toy shopping is nice, alone, and late at night. Not shopping in the middle of the day when you need to get somewhere in 20 minutes and the little man just needs that toy. He needs it.
2. Where did you go on your very first date? (Like…first first, not first with your spouse or current significant other!)
In sixth grade I went to see Pokemon: The movie with my first “real” boyfriend. Not a crush or someone who I just aimlessly followed around. We went to the three dollar show at the Apple Tree mall and my dad sat two rows behind us.

Kinda creepy

Awkward.
3. What’s your “silly” fear? (We’re not talking water and heights.)
Zombie Attacks. Plain and simple.

No baseball bat. SHOTGUN!!!

4. Confrontation: do you cause it, deal with is as it comes, or run far far away?
Aw, Geeze. Really? This question? Alright. I’m told that I cause it. Cause ya know, I’m Medusa. Normally, I just walk away from it. Or rather nowadays ignore the phone call or text for a couple of days until I need to deal with that certain person.
My anger or rather my grownupness has changed over the years. Before you say a bad thing towards me, I get in your face. Yo. But after years of self control and a couple of calls, I’ve change my ways. Just walk away…. they’re not worth it.
5. Wood floors or carpet?
HA! I’ve had carpet and wood floors. Carpet is nice because dust doesn’t build up continuously and you can vacuum the crap out of it and it looks great for a couple of hours. Wood floors are alright because you can wipe up spills, puke, poop from it without a problem and usually without a stain.
The problem right now is that wood floors are throughout the house, except for the kitchen and bathroom, that’s tile. So yeah, dust bunny central right here.

 

Totoro was such a cute movie.

Countdown

2 Mar

The big debate here is whether or not I’m going to write the entire story of why this is happening or just let it be to what it is.

Moving.

I met my ex-boyfriend in 2008 after I had left my ex-husband. Contrary to popular belief, I didn’t cheat on my husband. Never have and never will. After two years of an abusive relationship and being the only breadwinner I had enough and moved in with my grandmother. That’s when I started dating A (I’m removing his name because he’s a google investigator and will flip out if he sees it). Things were amazing from the start. We had a lot in common and it was a really good perspective from what I was use to.

Side note: I married my ex-husband at 18. First “real” love.

In 2008, we moved into our own place with my son. A small apartment, close to his college and not that bad of a commute to work. We worked together, we lived together. It was hard. Trying sometimes but we got through it.

It wasn’t until Summer of 2010 that the whole 24/7 thing got bad. Arguing a lot and snide remarks lead to the next thing that happened.

I don’t constitute cheating as right. I never do. You’re with someone, you should be in it or out of it.

So I decided to be out of it.

And sadly I’m still here.

Financial issues and then I lost my job last month. I agreed in October to be out by the first of April, which is one month from now. Truth is, I’m freaking out. I never moved somewhere without a job or at least some kind of financial back up that will keep me sleeping alright at night.

And another thing is, I hate not working. Yeah, I love being able to lazy around in my pjs all day long and the fact that I can spend more time with little man is great. But getting a regular paycheck every week, or every other week, or even monthly, keeps me calm. Being able to support my little man and to get him the things that he wants/needs is a releasing feeling that I can take care of him.

So for right now. I’m praying that I get a job, any type of job and soon. That I can find a home for me and my son and that I can receive the help that I need.

These are the days where we look towards God for enlightenment.

The stuffed peppers saved me

1 Mar

Honestly, this has been one of those days… and it sucks ass.

Important appointment to help out my family dis morning ended up with my truck not starting. Leaving late because of a certain person who wouldn’t wake up early like he said he would. I went to another place to get the help I need and then grocery shopping. Came back, my ex-husband came over to try to help me and take our son for the night. My truck’s battery ended up draining his truck’s battery. My ex-sister-in-law comes over, grabs grandma and baby boy, heads home. Roommate helping my ex when he comes home.

Did I cover everything?

The only thing awesome about today, the one and only thing, my stuffed peppers.

At least I know how to cook right.

Keep calm and drink jack.

25 Feb

So I’m not really new to all of this but I’m new to this platform WordPress. Trust me, it’s gotten my mind fuzzy.

Why did I move? Nothing against Blogger or anything like that. I just need a change. Hearing from so many people who change is near and you can’t go up until you reach rock-bottom, etc. etc.

I’m deciding that I’ll make my own changes rather than wait for something to appear.

Short intro: This is me. My name is Katie. Very simple. But I’m not a simple gal.

My son is 4 years old, Darrell, he’s a quirk and the sunshine of my life. I don’t want to think of where I’d be without him.

He likes to draw, eat, jump on people and sing Rihanna in the back of the car.

Of course if you look at him or sing along, he shuts up completely. To damn shy.

I’ve got this really weird family. Sometimes they piss me off, sometimes they make me cry, sometimes they are my bestties.

But I love them and defend them until my last breath.

My hobbies for enjoyment purposes? Again, not simple.

I tattoo people. I love doing it. Not the pleasure of seeing someone in pain, I pride myself in stopping every time they flinch.

But the art.

Oh the art.

Oh yeah… and I live in Buffalo, New York. Did I mention this place sucks so much?

My brother from Virginia came up in 2005 and said this area has two seasons, construction and winter.

I love the people. I love the food. OH DEAR GOD, chicken wings and blue cheese.

Hockey is what this area breathes and bleeds for, even the person who hates sports the most will peek at the score every once in a while.

 

So this is it.

A new beginning.

Stay tuned!

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